Therapists say it can be normal to resent a wealthier friend who repeatedly pays for expensive meals and outings, even when the gifts are appreciated. They advise identifying the source of the discomfort and talking about lower-cost ways to spend time together.
A Bread Financial survey cited by Moneywise found that 21% of people had lost a friendship over money, while 26% felt financially incompatible with friends. Therapists say repeated offers may leave someone feeling indebted or as if the friendship is being bought; differences in wealth can also prompt self-comparison and shame.
Experts suggest first identifying whether the discomfort is jealousy, embarrassment, guilt, indebtedness or fear that the friends’ lives are diverging. Then discuss it openly, acknowledge the generosity and suggest meals at home, cheaper restaurants or activities where spending is not the focus. One therapist also advised recognizing the nonfinancial contributions each person brings to the friendship.
